Monday, February 22, 2010

What Does He (do they) See In Me

Everyone who knows me well, knows that I talk to myself, A LOT. I also answer myself, A LOT. Sometimes in public, in the comfort of my own home, or whilst driving to and fro from whereever I happen to be going. Sometimes I have the music going, sometimes I don't, but most of the time, there is music blaring from the dashboard. I've been told by my YOUNGER chiltlins, that I play my music too loud, well they haven't started the Cashman's van in the morning! About blew my eardrums out the other day when I started his car for him. It was soooo loud, that you could hear the music with the doors shut.

It was one of the days, a work morning to be exact and I was just driving along, radio cranked to my fav Christian radio station and jamming, or fist pumping as the young-uns say, to the music. "This is my brand new day, starting right now..." not sure who the girl who sings this song is, but she sings it better than I do. Anyway, about 10 minutes into my drive, here I am, oh yeah it was this past Friday, jean day, no makeup, hair pulled up in a ponytail and just earrings, pink, to match my nice pink sweater and my socks. On my way to work just me and the car and my coffee. I stop at a stop light, and over to the right of me I catch sight of this guy in a beat up truck, just waving at me. At first it looked like someone I knew and then after I waved back, I realized, I didn't know who the heck this person was. But it was too late and whatever he read in that little wave, well what transpired over the next minutes, really made me think.

As I continued on my way, I could see out of the corner of my eye that the little black truck with Mr. Friendly was keeping right up with me. You know, like if you see a friend of yours and the two of you ride side-by-side down the road and carry on a car-to-car conversation. To test my therory, I sped up, then he sped up. I would slow down, and you guessed it, he slowed down. I kept this up for a bit until finally I was able to block him behind a car in front of him, and made my escape. Oh the thoughts that went through my mind! What if he is some psycho and follows me all the way to work? Should I make a run for the Sherriff's office or I was close enough to make it to the court house. I sighed a breath of relief when the little black truck with Mr. Smiley turned in the opposite direction!

That's when I lost it! At first I was scared and vowed not to ever ever again wave at another car unless I absolutely knew who was behind the wheel. The fact that it was a guy made it even creepier. But, as many of you know, when life hands me lemons, well I make lemonade. So I started thinking about this and if that is others see me, what is God looking at? I know that we are supposed to make a joyful noise unto the Lord, but what if other's are looking? Does that make the song sweeter, or just make you look silly? I'm not sure about that, but I'm not gonna stop talking to myself or singing at the top of my lungs...especially when I am by myself!

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